Things aren't going so well for Lois. Since mid-December I have applied for nearly 100 jobs. I have yet to have even one interview. I hope, at least, someone will make a colorful chalk outline of me when I finally hit the ground for good.
No one is more determined than I am - it's doubtful that anyone is more creative than I am. I've written and called people and met with decision makers about networking and job opportunities. I have volunteered for events knowing that you never know who will notice you if you're giving when you need the most help yourself.
On Library School: I completely regret the investment I made of time, effort and money for graduate school. I am aggravated that my graduate program was not more forthcoming about employment prospects or even placement assistance. I have asked faculty members for recommendations. I get no response from them, even after having earned high grades based on their syllabi. I have already lost touch with fellow students who have been on vacation since graduation. Their invitations to go out for drinks have stopped.
I have maybe a month before I will have to look at public assistance - and I am humiliated beyond description to admit that. I am considering surrendering my pets and I can hardly breathe when I even start thinking about it. I'm nearly always nauseated.
I have networked. I worked up to three jobs at a time while I put myself through school. I came home and did the dishes, I mowed my own yard, shoveled my own snow, fixed my own car... I chopped down trees that fell on my house, I fixed the hot water heater. I re-plumbed the bathroom.I have no cable (though that's not a sacrifice), I drive a car that is 23 years old. I cut my own hair. I haven't had a vacation for over 15 years.
I've become a social pariah. I can't blame anyone for not wanting to spend time with me. My entertainment consists of long walks or drinking iced tea these days.
A very dear friend of mine told me that she thought many of my friends just don't understand my situation. She said that on the surface I appear busy and capable. I hope she's right.
I turned off facebook - I've come to believe that it's a lie and, like Betty White said, "A giant waste of time."
I haven't given up. I am trying to stay positive, but please don't suggest that to me. I'm not given to violence, but the next person who tells me to stay positive or to get a job at Starbucks is likely to get a roundhouse to the throat.
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